Sunday in the Park
Dear Leading Ladies,
One of our Leading Ladies decided to take advantage of the beautiful weather recently and gather her dog into the car for a trip to a nearby park for a romp. Once there, she and the dog bounded out of the car only to be confronted by an angry man in a pickup truck. He rolled down his window and yelled that dogs were not allowed in the park. Our friend tried to defuse his vitriol, telling the man that she was on her way to the part of the park where dogs are allowed and he need not speak to her that way. He would have none of it. Her efforts only made him angrier. He continued to harass her, ultimately vowing to make sure no one ever tried to bring a dog into the park again.
Our friend quickly got back into her car with her dog. She drove away, shaken and frightened. After a few minutes, and a few miles away, she called the police, worried that he might try to confront someone else. They were kind and supportive but suggested that she should have called earlier. She knew that. They also asked if she had gotten the man’s licence plate number. She knew she had sight of the plate, but had been too rattled to take it in; plus she thought it would have angered the man more if he thought she was looking at his plate.
Unsplash
Sharing her experience with others afterwards, she understood that her encounter had been traumatic. She isn't sure she will go back to the park again, and certainly not alone. The sense of vulnerability was a new feeling for her, one she doesn’t like. Not feeling safe in a neighborhood park in the middle of the day robbed her of the sense of security she usually enjoys in her small town.
Soon, the experience led to other thoughts and feelings. What would it feel like to be a person of color reporting this or another situation to the police? What does it feel like every day for Black and brown people, citizens and non-citizen immigrants, documented and undocumented, to be accosted by aggressive individuals, representatives of discriminatory groups, or government agents?
If our friend’s experience as a white woman confronted by a lone angry man in a park was so disturbing, what is happening to the psyches and emotional well-being of those among us who are being harangued, accosted, interned, and physically harmed, all without due process or human decency.
We think this is a good time to review some information about our rights when we feel threatened by any person, group, or power.
Physical Self-Protection: People over 18 can own pepper spray, mace or other "self defense spray" without an FID (Firearm Identification Card) card in Massachusetts.
Psychological Self-Protection: When anyone threatens our sense of safety and security, it is unsettling and frightening and it can trigger some level of trauma. Seek out support from friends and family, as well as professionals, to process what occurred and what you may need.
These are the rights afforded to those approached by ICE (as provided by ACLU). Share them with those who may need them.
You have the right to remain silent. If you wish to exercise that right, say so out loud. (In some states, you may be required to provide your name if asked to identify yourself.)
You do not have to consent to a search of yourself or your belongings, but police may pat down your clothing if they suspect a weapon.
If you are arrested by police, you have the right to a government-appointed lawyer.
If you are detained by ICE, you have the right to consult with a lawyer, but the government is not required to provide one for you. You can ask for a list of free or low-cost alternatives.
You do not have to answer questions about where you were born, whether you are a U.S. citizen, or how you entered the country.
We wish our Leading Lady many fearless days in parks with her dog. And we wish millions of other hard-working, frightened men and women in this country many future days and nights free of fear, too.
Therese (she/her/hers)
Judy (she/her/hers)
Didi (she/her/hers)
Leading Ladies Executive Team
Leadingladiesvote.org
ladies@leadingladiesvote.org